Taking weed on Vacay?

Are you taking cannabis
Libguides.spsd.org

Just so we are clear……this is an opinion piece.

And it is about personal use.

For the record, I am a juicer…..give me a monster glass of Jack and a scorching sunset any day.

But, having some relatives in the ‘medical biz’ in AZ and since I travel through the Caribbean and Mexico regularly it does give me some insight into what I see happening.

And I get lots of questions about it.

Stoners tell me people should just chill and go for it.  Others tell me horror stories about spending days in a hot-sweaty-stinky jail.

You wouldn’t bring ice to Alaska, right?

But,

Here are some tips I have been given by people who seem to know what they are talking about.

Tip 1.

TSA is not law enforcement.

Their focus is on terrorism and security threats to the aircraft and you.

If TSA does stumble across your stash and they are in a bad mood – they will call local law and let them handle it.

Tip 2.

Don’t break into a full blown panic attack at the site of a pooch.

I have been told by dog trainers that a dog can only be trained to find 1 (one) genre of a substance so generally they’re trained to sniff out other things, not your stash.

C4 does not smell like Blackberry Kush.

And Rover is more interested in your emotional support peacock.

Tip 3.

Bring your med card if you have one. 

Nothing like Flying Anxiety to make you do crazy shit and forget.  It could get you some sympathy when you need it most. Or maybe a nicer jail cell.

Tip 4.

Don’t take flower…..quantity and smell is a big problem.

On my last trip I saw a guy get the red light going into Mexico (When you exit customs you press a button and random red or green lights up.  Red means your bags get searched.).

By the time I walked up to press the button a very big nasty looking guard was holding up a huge bag of weed – and the guy who owned it was trying to look invisible.

Tip 5.

Vape pens and concentrates are all the rage.  Separate the battery from the cartridge, don’t pack them together.

Also, I have never seen a Security agent asking for one of your gummies or a bite of your brownie.

Tip 6.

If you get caught shut the F’ up.

Wailing and gnashing your teeth will only get you deeper in poo.

I saw a couple screaming at a Airport guard once.  It did not turn out well for them.

Crying is cool…..just wait until you are out of sight of your friends.

Tip 7.

Be sure you have a bank account or a credit card with a high limit.

It will probably cost you $1-2k in fines.

You will be on the beach in no time, hopefully.

Tip 7.

DON’T bring anything back to the US.

That is just plain stupid.

Bonus Tip

Fly Private…..far less scrutiny

So there you go……..

Everything is so psycho at the moment that no matter what people tell you, it could be wrong.

You life depends on who has the handcuffs.

~Jake

P.S.  Don’t be humming this while standing at the Customs Counter.

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About Jake Johnson 242 Articles
Jake Johnson is a full-time travel bum, who prefers warm climates where the women wear less clothing. We've tried to teach him things like manners and diplomacy, but we've given up and simply rely on our editors to remove the most offensive bits from his articles. We take no responsibility for his inane ramblings opinions - they are his own.
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